The Jewish people were faced with the biggest decision of their lives. Hashem had presented them with the choice about whether to accept the Torah or not. They responded with the words that reverberate throughout history that “We will do and we will hear”, which signified an unconditional acceptance of all of the responsibilities that are included in the Torah.

Often people try to avoid taking on responsibilities, especially when they interfere with their comforts and pleasures. Responsibilities can be thought of in a negative manner. Most people associate responsibilities with the chores that they were compelled to do as children. The Jewish people obviously had a different perspective about the matter. They embraced the mitzvos that they were being offered with such passion that they accepted them unconditionally even without knowing the details of what they were accepting.

The reality is that obligations and expectations can be used in a positive manner. First, they can be used as a tool to help us to develop into the best and most productive person that we can be. When a child takes responsibility to learn how to spell or to read, this helps them develop skills that they need for life. An employee who takes the responsibilities of their job seriously and realizes that they are obligated to do their job well will be more likely to perform their duties well, and as a result, they are more likely to keep their job and be successful in their career. Even though it is possible to develop the skills or to do our job productively even without taking responsibility, such as because we enjoy it, we generally will not do it as well. We will often lose our motivation and interest over time.



Second, we can think about the correlation between a person’s value and the degree of responsibilities, obligations, and expectations that are placed upon them. When someone is in an important position in their family, company, or society, they obviously will have a high degree of responsibility, and the expectations upon them will be significant. They will be held accountable for the job that they do, and there will be ramifications for them if they do not do a good job.



All people are important, and our job in This World is important. Therefore, we have great responsibilities. We are expected to work hard to fulfill those responsibilities, and we will be held accountable if we do not put in that effort. If there is an authority figure in our lives who has the proper appreciation of our value, and they hold us accountable for working hard in order to develop the perspectives and the skills that we need in order to be successful, they are doing us a favor.



The same is true within our relationships. We all have important jobs to do in our relationships. We are obligated and obligated to do our jobs properly, there are consequences when we do not do our jobs properly, and we will be held accountable if we neglect our jobs.



When an authority figure creates a set of expectations with the child’s, the student’s, or the employee’s best interests in mind, their goal will be to help to create the success that is in the best interests of the other person. When they hold the other person accountable, it is as a tool to encourage hard work, and the goal of hard work is the other person’s success.



We are sometimes in a position to create responsibilities (including expectations and accountability) either for others or ourselves. Sometimes, we need to explain to someone else how to relate to their responsibilities, and other times, we need to deal with our own responsibilities. In all of these situations, it is important to look at responsibilities and accountability as means of and motivations for succeeding rather than as an annoyance and a system of control.



When a system has been created by someone else, we cannot control their attitudes or their implementation. In those situations, it is important to try our best to use the system as a means of succeeding. But we also need to be aware of the challenges that come along with authority that is critical, condescending, controlling, manipulative, or abusive, and we need to protect ourselves from this behavior. From a Torah perspective, we have a right and a responsibility to protect ourselves from being harmed by others. At the same time, we are not free from our responsibility to consider the other person’s needs to the degree that is reasonable in each given situation. With the proper guidance, we often can navigate these difficult situations in a manner in which we will be protected from being hurt and can have a productive relationship as well.



One of the pitfalls in a situation in which we have responsibilities that are created by another person is that we may develop the mindset that we are only doing our job in order to achieve a positive result or avoid a negative result. This can hold us back from looking to find meaning and significance in the job itself.

Thankfully, Hashem gave us the opportunity to have the mitzvos, which give us the responsibilities and opportunities to improve ourselves and to find the true success in this world and the next. We should all merit to appreciate our opportunities and make the best of them.